Rush Passed his Drug Test!

Obviously worried about Sen. Tom Harkin’s direct hit to Rush’s drug habits,
today at the top of his show the wingnut’s P.T. Barnum announced he’d gone in
for his monthly screening and passed it.

HAZAAH! Republicans must be so proud. The man they want to commend on the floor of the House has finally, after 18 months on probation for being a druggie, passed his drug test. It defines “family values” in a whole new way. Rush has now taken to reading the names and airing the statements of obscure House members who suck up to the radio veteran smearing chickenhawk, one saying he deserves “mega kudos” for what he’s doing on the air.

The glaring reality
for Rush is that he wanted to send a message to his audience not to worry, that
he wasn’t on drugs anymore. Good for him. But this is the guy Republicans want
to represent them? Wingnut radio listeners will follow anyone as long as they
print out the script. Rush pimped this story on his show today.

No, Sen. Tom Harkin, radio talker Rush Limbaugh isn’t back on drugs! So says the state of Florida. And Limbaugh himself, who told Page Two, as he enters his last month on probation for a narcotics arrest, that he doesn’t even miss getting high and now feels like a better person. And a much richer one: According to records, he’ll have made an estimated $50 million while on conditional liberty. “All’s well that ends well,” he said, contemplating the Oct. 31 finish of his 18-month probation, barring unforeseen trouble. “But I tell myself sometimes: ‘I can’t believe I did this s—-.’ “ In a rare interview, Limbaugh – who just this week created a firestorm by calling antiwar service members “phony soldiers,” prompting Iowa Democrat Harkin’s comment from the floor of the U.S. Senate – says he isn’t bitter. Never mind that the justice system forced him to fill out monthly reports on his whereabouts, get tested and attend therapy. “The system is what it is,” Limbaugh, 56, said from his oceanfront compound in Palm Beach. “I became addicted to drugs because of a medical condition” – a bad back – “and I’m convinced now that most addicts come to a point where they do drugs just to stave off withdrawal. “The only thing I regret is that, because of legal and business reasons, I haven’t been able to tell my story. But I’ll ponder how I could start sharing because I’ve often wanted to.” … .. Limbaugh leaves probation better, richer

Can’t wait for the fantasy tale of “All the Days of Rush’s Life.” Should be a real page turner.

Then, after announcing he’d passed his drug test, Rush took out after Elizabeth
Edwards, because she dared to suggest that Rush’s advertisers be asked if this
is the type of person they support. She ticked Rush off by slapping him around mercilessly last night in a radio interview,
saying that the same thing that kept him out of the military should actually
also keep him from sitting on his butt all day doing radio. That’s when el Rushbo
turned and fired, once again using the “Breck Girl” shot, coupled
with calling Edwards an “ambulance chaser,” going downhill from there. It’s always so obvious when Rush receives a direct hit. He falls for the bait every time. Nice going, Mrs. Edwards.

So make no mistake about it. The Republican pied piper of the president, by Rush’s own admission, and
all of his people has felt the incoming, because he’s been on the defensive going
on nine days now. So much so that today Rush felt compelled to announce I’M
OFF DRUGS… I PASSED MY DRUG TEST!

Really, talk about low expectations.